Thoughts...

Darknes is upon me when I wake up and head out to do morning chores. Soon it will be as equally dark for evening chores. Such is how life is. You can't prevent nature from taking it's course.You may interfere but not necessarily.. you know what I mean.

I've been doing a lot of pondering about my life recently. I earmark everything from the time I've moved to this house 1) Still broke- need to fix that 2) More fulfilled in the artistic sense 3) Jobs suck... 4)I like being home creating and being with my animals So having said that, signs are pointing to doing what I thought would be a yarn shop from the house. I've been repeating that for some time but need venture capital for inventory.

Another interesting tidbit I discovered about myself is that I secretly want to live in a fictious world of a deceased painter. Sounds like some kind of silly story line for some kids' movie doesn't it? Years ago, I fell in love with this man's work. I own many 1000 pce jigsaw puzzles of his work that I have glued together and hang on my walls.Charles Wysocki seems to depict a lifestyle and time to which I can relate and would love to belong to. You can view some of his work here:http://www.charleswysocki.com/default.aspx?id=2 and also purchase calendars prints etc...

Could this be one of the reasons that I am feeling that I don't quite fit in anymore? Or is it just my creative soul coming to the forefront? An incident at work most recently has made me take notice of what motivates some people...and why does karma sometimes take too long? What it really did was open my eyes to how unfair things are and my instincts, the ethical part in me does not compute hence can't get over the bad. And so, no longer want to be part of that- life is too short to give in to other people's stresses. So back I go to my fantasy life captivated in someone's brush strokes.

I've been experimenting with hand painting and yesterday's attempt was a success! So, may try some more today. I must clean the back of the barn as the farrier comes today.. more money I don't have but the horsies need their pedicures whereas I haven't had a haircut in almost a year. Contemplating a radical change there...Or maybe I'll start a puzzle.....

Scattered Thoughts, Scattered Leaves...

I was recently told by a fellow creative that I should Blog more frequently....so here is an attempt at purging my thoughts. Yesterday was very productive for me as I designed a mitten pattern-on paper- which means it will be altered a dozen times before test knitting. Nothing complicated, just something for when I get my shop going and will be using my own wool! Yes folks, all this time sitting at home thinking, I could be making money if my shop were opened...If...2 lettters that can keep you up at night or keep you going with steadfast determination.

I firmly believe that things happen for a reason. The fact that I only work on Saturdays, when the car is available is not a sign to be ignored. Things are pointing me to this direction , the woolly path, and I must admit, I would rather be my own boss; a nice compassionate one....

Another thing that popped into my mind was Wool Week in Shetland is well underway. Now that would be an awesome event to attend! Well, why not go next year? I've a year to find funds. Then I thought, things like these are better shared with folks who share similar tastes and interests... so why not organize a tour??? Perhaps more of a group of folks to attend wool week together? There is so much happening and you don't have to attend it all & many things there are free. So if any of you readers( I know you're out there lurking) are interested, probably easier if you were from the Ottawa area or could get here...planning stages at this point. Let me know what you think! Leave a comment or message me on Ravelry showmethemoney is my user name!


Today's tasks at Karberry Farm are not so creative. We must replace a window in a door of the house as the weather is much colder, we need that gap filled. The cold air is creeping into the office as I type. I will also be building my turkey coop in the barn so that they have indoor shelter. So off I go....

Back to the Drawing Board

Yesterday I had started this blog entry and it disappeared while I was adjust the position of some photos- not impressed. So here we are again.

So, that enclosure I erected of electrified tape, 4 strands to be correct = epic failure. On Monday we decided to let the sheep out into the pen. The leader, the black ewe, went in and then made a spectacular leap between the top and 2nd strand! I stood in amazement, thinking now what? Holy crow, portable electric netting will be a must.Those of you with sheep will be saying , yeah saw that coming but I had to try because:  a) use it, b) be frugal. I am now rich in experience !

On Friday, fitting for thanksgiving weekend I made a new acquisition to Karberry Farm. No, not sheep, not yet....Turkeys!!! A breeding pair of Narragansetts! They are from this Spring's hatch. The Seller was going to be by the area so hubby picked them up in Kemptville. They are in the chicken tractor acclimatising to our yard. Soon, their pen will be ready...provided I have access to a vehicle that works... So hopefully in the Spring I will have poults- hubby approves of this and he is already hustling for sales next year.. The feathers are beautifully colored with patterns to boot! I am starting to see it as how I create my flocks- by color!

I also experimented with overdying some wool. Originally, they were dyed with plant material. So, I started with some of the paler stuff.

Not a great photo, but there is a variation in the colors. The outside of the cake is darker. When wound into skeins to dry, the colors are awesome. These are ideal for 1 hank projects. I will be handpainting something today...stay tuned.

I leave you with a photo of some of the roosters. If anyone would like one, please let me know!

Face the fear or buy a better ladder.

I decided to create a small enclosure for my sheep, near, the barn but not attached to the barn. This means, they will have to be herded to their " area". It will be 4 strands of electric tape fencing. If that doesn't keep them in, perhaps a concrete block wall might. In order to enclose the sheep, I needed to get the step-in posts from the loft above the barn. We are talking about 14 feet in height, not terribly high. It was cool & windy when I decided to venture out. The sun had been playing hide&goseek with my laundry all morning so I thought I best get on with it. I took the ladder from the barn and placed it below the entrance to the loft. As I put my foot on the first rung, the ladder moved. Not just a bit but quite a bit...I believe that this was the ladder that my husband fell onto when he rolled off the lower ledge of the chicken coop....another story for another time.... I repositioned the ladder & wondered if it was the ladder or the wind? The ground is never ever flat where you need to work. I try again. I go up a few rungs and the ladder seems to want to walk away from the barn. This leaves me with a gap that I don't feel comfortable with trying to gain access to a hole 14 feet above the ground.

My middle son is working on his truck in the machine shed nearby. I yell for him. Nothing. I yell again. He saunters over and says: "What?" If I could I would smack him as I believe what I want is rather obvious. "Please hold the ladder so that I can gain access to the poles up there or do you want to do it?" He rearranges the ladder. I sart to climb.."Aren't you going to hold it?" I ask. "What are you afraid of- falling, it's not that high." Yes. I am afraid of falling. I give him a look. He holds the ladder until I am partly into the loft and then he walks away. As I crawl into the opening, the ladder moves. I hasten my way- the ladder is still upright but now my issue is how to get down without killing myself?? I mutter a few curse words and set about locating the posts. I launch them out forgetting there are chickens below and I am reminded of this with hearing a few squawks. "Oops, sorry!" I exclaim to whichever chicken I may have startled.

Now I turn myself and sit on the ledge of the opening and gaze out. Nice view, would be better without some of the branches but how often will I be sitting up here... The longer I sit, the more I realize that it isn't that high, really. I think to myself that I've jumped higher on a trampoline, I've dismounted from uneven bars close to this height, I've jumped out of a window of a 3 story building...add "when I was younger" to all this and I think we all get the picture. I decide to make my way down the ladder. Before I take the first step, I see a truck driving by a little slower than normal. Great, it's my neighbour. Probably wondering what the cityot is up to today. If I don't move, will he not see me..oh please don't wave...And he waves. I've been spotted. Red plaid running shoes dangling out of the loft.

It is my fault. I always seem to give the locals something to talk about. But then again, I am quite comfortable being the crazy woman with all the critters in the haunted house...I think there's a word for it but no one dare say it.

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance

As the title may suggest, I have suffered another loss of a family member. An unavoidable phenomenon that unfortunately seems to be occuring more frequently. A few more empty seats at the dining table for the family get togethers. As I listened to the mass, I created mental notes of what I would like if it were to be my wake. The voice in my head says: "Who cares- you'll be gone!"

 Well, it certainly had me pondering, after experiencing the loss of a few loved ones, what is it that makes this experience so sad? The voice replies:"Duh, because you're losing someone, hence why they say they're gone, departed..." I don't like the voice's tone. I ponder this more as someone recites the beatitudes. Not a religious person, but I've been to more of these "Celebrations of life"that I feel I could probably give one should the pastor be stuck in traffic.

If I haven't seen someone in some time & learn of their death, I may shed a few tears. It's not the frequency or the location but more so how deep the relationship that triggers the internal grief button. What that person has meant to me, what experiences we've shared. The closer they are, the more difficultt o imagine your life without them. Circumstances seem to play a part in attibuting sadness. An accident, a young person, a person suffering etc...Ultimately, it is selfish but understood & accepted. A rite of passag as it is part of existing.

At this moment, I still become teary-eyd but it is getting better. I really should be looking for employment but battering my self-esteem seems so counterproductive and not the postive enrgy boost I require right now.
As for my one celebration of life, it will indeed be just that. Just you be fortunate enough to be left behind for it, I hope you will enjoy the bagpipes and the scotch. Drinks are on me!

September...

So the beginning of September is leaving me with much chagrin. A loss of employment, consequently loss of funds, projects that are not turning out quite as expected-such is my life. If it wasn't for having to eat, we could possibly live on 1 salary... but the way things are going, prices increase, pay stays the sameor less in my case & that's where the problems occur. The knitting I can fix, the job thiug isn't such a quick fix.

Alas, the knitting part is what bothers me the most. I cast on with some handpainted yarn to make a shawl. After 1.5 repeats, the colors started to pool despite the fact that there were 4 increases every other row. I've used this type of yern before in other shawls & scarves with pleasing results. So, a note on the pattern for future as well as the yarn. After that, I decided that I should piece together a vest that I had knit. Cables at the front & back, to be seamed together with a 3 needle bind off. Nothing tricky here except that the bloody cables don't line up at the shoulders. That goes for both fronts!! Bugger! A note written on that pattern also. Yes it's a relatively easy fix but it shouldn't have happened. Perhaps it was the knitter? Possibly but if it happened accurately on both pieces of the front, I somehow doubt it.Hmm.

Last but not least, I am attempting mittens- fox & geese pattern. Of course, I see a mistake a few rows down- probably due to the fact that I tried to make these on my lunch breaks in a place I hate. So, after I've conducted my job search for today, I will repair mittens & continue with a scarf I've started as a gift for someone who does not celebrate Christmas but will get it by then anyway- a token of appreciation! It's not a complicated pattern but reversible. Seems safe given the difficulties I've been experiencing.

Alas, sheep breeding season is but a few months away. I am leaning toward purchasing new and having them bred than sending my girls out. Of course, I will need to really turn the couch cushions inside out for that to take place. The prices are dropping this Fall due to the drought. So, if anyone can think of possible employment opportunities for me, you can help(enable)add more fleece=wool=knitting to my flock & consequently into your hands. Sounds like a win-win doesn't it? Anyone? Buehler?

I'm a bummer Dude!

Sorry folks if I've let you down by not writing, posting, joking, laughing, visiting etc.. I was very excited a few months ago to re-join the ranks of the employed, only to discover to my chagrin that I will only be working when needed to. So, as of Sept 2nd, I will have a big whopping 3.25 hours per week to pay my bills feed, etc...

I did not post anything in the last little while because I was not in a terribly nice mood & I learned that I should not let others influence me to such a degree. Well, let me tell you, as a Pisces, I read people's feelings all the time & it wears me out. So, I withdrew in order to save what little sanity I claim to ever have had.

Now I am facing a major bummer of not having enough funds all over again. So, keeping my game plan in the forefront is difficult when obligations supercede what I want vs what I need. So, goodbye Rhinebeck this year, perhaps next...( I can't count how many years I've said that now)

On the positive side, things happen for a reason- am I meant to find better employment? I hope it comes sooner than the last job as I can't thrive for very long without the money. That just sounds so awful yet, when the bill collectors start calling, they don't care what your story is.If anyone has any thoughts on future work for me, please contact me. I am serious. At the moment. I am trying to figure out which burger flipping place is the better option...sad but true. Like the song says: I gots ta get paid!